It’s funny in life how things change. One day, everything seems to be going according to plan. The next, it’s like trying to drive a ship through a hurricane.
I am not a good captain. My ship is in the middle of a hurricane and I don’t know how to right it. I don’t even know how to ask to help. I make more mistakes than I do things right. Sometimes, I wonder what is wrong with me.
There has to be an end to the hurricane… but what will I find when I get there? Peace? Pain? Love? Hurt? I just don’t know. I know what I want to find… but will I ever find it? I’d be lying if I said that I didn’t have my doubts. I have the feeling that it’ll be just like every other time, I find that which I did not want to find.
I often wished that life were more simple, like me. And that in school, they’d hand out a “Guide to Life” pamphlet, then maybe I wouldn’t be so lost all of the time. How can such a smart guy like me be so dumb and ignorant?
I guess that’s enough self-loathing for one day. It’s time for me to head back to Georgia and prepare my house for the next phase of my life…selling my house.
