As I have come to realize that it is only a part of life. That makes my greater fear… life, itself. I do, however, sometimes fear HOW I will die, not that it is an eventuality that I will die. We are all going to die. It’s not how we die that defines us, it’s how we live.
There are so many diseases that kill. Men and women who kill. Adults, teenagers, and even the older generation. So, why fear death when it’s coming? In death, there will be a certain peace that we may not feel in life. Do not mistake my non fear of death for a desire to die. At least not until I feel like I have lived a full life. I, in fact, feel like my life has only begun. So, with God’s blessing, I will be around to annoy and amuse everybody for many years to come.
I fear life more. Pain, both emotional and physical, is not something that I, nor anybody, enjoys. LIfe brings joy, pain, happiness, sadness, elation, an desperation. We laugh and we cry. We smile and we frown. We do things like drink and take drugs to ease the pain. (Note that not all people who do these activities do it for pain relief but also for pleasure). Life can be easy and it can be difficult. Some of it is brought on by ourselves and some of it is brought on by others. It’s how we deal with it that makes us stronger. And, in this sense, I am a very weak man. I do need to learn to deal with pain and sadness in a way that makes me stronger rather than sulking and telling everybody how sad I am. For this, I am not going to let too many people about my pain. Only my inner circle will ever know.
If you actually read this blog, you just might be in my inner circle.
In any case, this is something I have been thinking about today and felt like writing about it is the same sort of therapy as writing poetry.
I believe that I am now finished with this blog post. Go forth in peace and love each other as God loves you.
