{"id":10,"date":"2007-02-17T09:46:40","date_gmt":"2007-02-17T02:46:40","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/mmolenda.com\/oldblog\/?p=10"},"modified":"2007-07-30T07:10:44","modified_gmt":"2007-07-30T12:10:44","slug":"from-the-heart%e2%80%a6","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/mmolenda.com\/oldblog\/?p=10","title":{"rendered":"From the heart"},"content":{"rendered":"

The One<\/strong><\/p>\n

I keep thinking to my self, does my one even exist? \u009d If she does, where is she? In my future? In my past? In my present? I always thought that I had already met her and now she’s gone. Maybe she’ll come back out of my past maybe I am dreaming.<\/p>\n

What happens to me is I will like a girl only to watch her go off with somebody else. Is there something wrong with me? Maybe she wasn’t the one? Maybe she was and I ran her off?<\/p>\n

I just don’t believe there is anyone for me. Until I meet her, I won’t believe. But how will I know?<\/p>\n

I really don’t know anymore.<\/p>\n

Signs<\/strong><\/p>\n

I drew this analogy earlier this week,\u00a0 if a woman’s signs were like traffic signs, I’d be dead by now. I would have wrecked my car in an impressive ball of fire. Explosions can be cool. But not when they involve me.<\/p>\n

I am just a fairly simple-minded guy. I need everything laid out for me. I don’t like playing games (except the video kind..). Because, I will fail. That is my past experience. And as of now, I do not foresee that changing.<\/p>\n

What Am I?<\/strong><\/p>\n

You know, that’s a pretty fair question. A geek or a nerd? Or a combination of both? I am not really smart enough to really be either, though. I know I am a failed musician. I know that I am a wannabe poet. I know that I am not much of a catch. But I know I could be if I found the “one.”<\/p>\n

What am I looking for?<\/strong><\/p>\n

I am not looking for a one-night stand. I am looking for someone to share my life with me. My experiences. Me. Who I am and what I am (of course, what am I?). I am looking for someone who can look inside me, inside the rough exterior and see that there is an actual heart in there. Believe me, I bleed.<\/p>\n

Why am I posting this here?<\/strong><\/p>\n

That, my friends, is the question of the day. But it is a bit therapeutic to put my feelings into words. That’s why I write my “poetry.”\u009d Even my psychologist during my senior year of high school encouraged me to write. And I have ever since. So, you can take my “poems” at face value. They are just how I am feeling at the time I wrote them. Just like this one:<\/p>\n

Alone<\/strong><\/p>\n

Am I better off alone
\nThan to be with someone?
\nAm I better doing my own thing
\nThan to worry about another?<\/p>\n

Is it worth being alone
\nTo not disappoint someone?
\nIs it worth worrying about being alone
\nWhen I could be doing more?<\/p>\n

Should I stay alone
\nOr find someone of my own?
\nShould I think about being alone
\nInstead of just accepting it?<\/p>\n

Why should I not be alone
\nWhen I have it all?
\nWhen I am alone
\nDo I only have myself to blame?<\/p>\n

Alone is sometimes how I like to be
\nMeans that I am always free
\nSometimes I wonder what it would be like
\nTo not be alone anymore<\/p>\n

I don’t remember when I actually wrote this, but it was in the past year. Enjoy.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

The One I keep thinking to my self, does my one even exist? \u009d If she does, where is she? In my future? In my past? In my present? I always thought that I had already met her and now … Continue reading →<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[3],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-10","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-life"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/mmolenda.com\/oldblog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/10","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/mmolenda.com\/oldblog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/mmolenda.com\/oldblog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/mmolenda.com\/oldblog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/mmolenda.com\/oldblog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=10"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/mmolenda.com\/oldblog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/10\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/mmolenda.com\/oldblog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=10"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/mmolenda.com\/oldblog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=10"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/mmolenda.com\/oldblog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=10"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}